Apap plays Mozart - 3rd movement Cadenza

No wonder why Gilles Apap is sometimes dubbed the French Kennedy...

Wind and tea

I wish... I could have a walk on a beach like that, and then go back home for a cup of tea. Feeling the cold wind on my face, and then the warmth of my mug under my hands. But the nearest beach is 250 km away from here, so I will settle for tea and imagine the bit with the beach.

Violinic charisma

Well, I had only ever heard about the guy. Now I have seen one of his concerts on dvd, and I am absolutely dazzled. Nigel Kennedy rocks.

And if Nigel Kennedy is old news to you, try Gilles Apap.
Kennedy is more influenced by Hendrix or The Doors, and Apap is apparently more into a bohemian, Indian sort of music (even when they are playing classical music). But when you look at them playing, you have the same impression that they become one with their violin.

It is completely addictive.

Cliché

Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Something is new in the state of Denmark

Beware! This post is going to be extremely self-centered. Feel free to skip it.

I have been mentally comparing this academic year with the last one. The thing is, since I failed the agrégation last year (I even hate saying it), I am doing it all over again, going to the (mostly) same classes, living in the same place, and so on. So nothing has changed much, really. And still, everything is different... Exam-wise I am more stressed out because it's the second attempt and there is more pressure, but I know what to expect, which helps a lot. Many of the students preparing for the exams are new, and some teachers were replaced by others. It's a blend of new and old faces inside the same picture.

There are a couple of persons I already knew, but whom I am getting to know better. I realize I have quite a hard time making friends. It takes me forever to trust someone enough to really bond with them. Or rather, only a very small number of persons can make me feel safe enough to go there. Last year it didn't happen once, and I felt very lonely. So I am amazed at how everything is/feels different now. I hope the persons I am getting to know better now will become real friends.
Only time can tell!

Here are my Christmas presents from Frank. He took them in Beijing:

"you didn't know???"

Lately I've listened to a mind-spinningly wide variety of music genres, and I love every one of them. There are a couple of genres I definitely don't like (and don't believe I will anytime soon), but I feel like my tastes could stretch endlessly.... It might be because I have so little choice in my life right now, about what to do or think, that it's a way for me to compensate for my frustration -- sailing on the vast ocean seas of musical exploration.

I have only recently discovered the band "Godspeed You! Black Emperor", which apparently is Canadian. It is some sort of ambient post-rock, with sounds that sometimes remind me of Pink Floyd, and sometimes of Archive, among others. The tracks are very long (often over 15 minutes) and create an enthralling atmosphere.
When I ask my friends if they know Godspeed, I'm sure they'll look at me like I'm nuts and say "you didn't???" -- which is usually what happens when I think I've discovered something. Imagine how Columbus or Vespucci would have felt if they had come back to Europe and everyone had said "what, you mean you didn't know???"
-- at least Don Cristobal wouldn't look so offended for nothing...

Morphée m'aime

(Nymphe et Satyre)

My bedtime music tonight:
Archive - You all look the same to me - Again
Jeff Buckley - Live at Sin-é - Hallelujah & Lover, you should have come over
The Tindersticks - Waiting for the moon - Until the Morning Comes
Jesse Sykes & The Sweet Hereafter - Reckless Burning - Reckless Burning
Robert Plant & The Strange Sensation - Mighty Rearranger - All the Kings Horses

Oh, Morpheus, give me joy till morning For my forever painful love: Just blow out candles' burning And let my dreams in blessing move. Let from my soul disappear The separation's sharp rebuke! And let me see that dear look, And let me hear voice that dear. And when will vanish dark of night And you will free my eyes at leaving, Oh, if my heart would have a right To lose its love till dark of evening! Alexander Sergeyevich Pushkin (1799-1837)

My name is -

Yesterday night we had a great conference about Casino Royale -- both the 1953 novel and the 2006 film -- and about how the representation of Britishness has changed. A lot of paratextual elements too, that is to say how the novel and the films were promoted, in what particular way they were received and so on. Then my friend and I went to the restaurant with two teachers and the guest, and had a great time talking about films and research and teaching. There is a wide range of possibilities within the field of cultural studies that I can't wait to explore... the world is not enough!

Please don't talk to me

Mr Bennet to Elizabeth in Pride and Prejudice:
"You are not going to be missish, I hope, and pretend to be affronted at an idle report. For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbours, and laugh at them in our turn?"

weapons of mass antisocial behaviors

I am presently being bothered by the she-homo-laptopian seated at my left.

I was quietly reading about Determinism in History on the internet and listening to Mozart (the very relaxing clarinet concerto) when this student arrived. All of a sudden all I could hear was the combination of her frantic typing and of the erratic rhythm of her open-mouthed chewing. The typing isn't so bad, but the chewing is so high-pitched that I had to switch from Mozart to swing, and considerably raise the volume of my headphones.

"Universal -chew- determin-chew-ism depends on a -chew-concept of cau-chew-sation that was -chew- not -chew chew-generally adopted -chew-until after the seven-chew-teenth-century-chew- “scientific rev-chew chew-olution.”"

I thought maybe she has to finish some paper and is stressed out about it. But no, she is actually chatting on the internet. I know it's bad to look at what others are doing, but she was the one invading my personal space in the first place.
So now I'm posting this misanthropic message while listening to a rather loud Sinatra. (And as I'm typing this, another student is taking place at my right, with a huge book entitled Molière. Now this one I like!)

I know, I'm proud and prejudiced...

Why won't you talk to me

My internet connection at home is broken right now...

It's very weird to be sitting in a corner in a hallway of building J on campus, surrounded by fellow homo laptopians. Apparently we're all here to benefit from the joys of world wide communication, all plugged to the wall for power and connected to the wireless network, and all very carefully avoiding eye-contact with one another. That's what I don't like about university: it should be a place of absolute open-mindedness and exchanges, and instead in seven years I've found it more difficult to make friends here than anywhere else in the city.

I have stood here before...

When I have to walk in the pouring rain, I love the moment when I'm so completely soaked that I don't even care anymore. I'm standing in the street with my hands in my pockets, and I let the water run down my face as if I were in my shower. People run around with their collars up, holding things over their heads, trying to hide from the rain, and I'm there, wholly relaxed, waiting for the traffic to stop. It feels like time has slowed down for me only. I get the exact same feeling when I look at this picture...

Un samedi soir sur la Terre

Fireplace lit, jazz playing, pictures of summer vacations on the walls, souvenirs of my best friend's wedding on the homemade piece of furniture, waiting for parents to return from shopping, waiting for friends and family to come for dinner. Here and now is home.